It will be my second year as the Co-Director of Filipino Heritage Camp (FHC) and the first year that any of the 10 Colorado Heritage Camps (CHC) has two Directors that are both adult adoptees in its 19 years of existence.

I volunteered as a camp counselor in 2000 when I came across the website after doing a search on line. I still have the printed emails that I sent to the CHC Director who is pictured to the left.


I was not sure what I was getting into - traveling solo to Denver, CO to be a counselor to young kids who were adopted from the Philippines. I comforted by the fact that there was a fellow young adult adoptee that I could relate to and that a couple families happened to be on the same Motherland tour 2 years earlier!

Fast forward a decade later and many hours on the phone with my fellow co-counselor and now Co-Director. I would like to think I am ten years wiser and more experienced to take a leadership role in a camp that has become a second home and family to me.

It will be our 4th consecutive year traveling to the Rockies with my son who has been attending and recently participating as a camper, which will undeniably help play a role in his own identity development.

A gal cc'd me in an email to a fellow adopted person from the Philippines. She revealed that she came across a picture on our orphanage page on Facebook and identified herself; an image she had never seen before, a photo of herself before the age of 4 years.

The photo was taken a couple years before I was born but somehow I felt an instant connection with her as we spoke that same night. Her excited voice was rambling and asking questions that I could not necessarily answer. It was one of those conversations that could have gone on for hours as we compared notes about what our Pilipinas passport looked like and if I knew any of the names she blurted out.

This recent reunion of sorts has me thinking whether I want to find more information about my life in the orphanage. This gal has a sister who is my age and is very likely that we were at the orphanage at the same time.

I always feel like I am having an out of body experience when I have these encounters. As though they are unreal and I am an observer. I guess this is part of my adoption that I am still working out and attempting not to alienate myself from the fact that I lived in the orphanage for the first five years of my life.

Webinars are Genius!

I registered for a webinar (a seminar on the web) on The Role of the U.S. Government in Intercountry Adoptions through the Joint Council on International Children's Services. Their mission is to, "promote ethical child welfare practices, strengthens professional standards and educates adoptive families, social service professionals and government representatives throughout the world."

JCICS provided a panel, which included Government representatives and adoption professionals that spent the two hours explaining the often confusing process of adopting, terminology, the role of the Hague Convention and other facets. Additionally, the power point presentation was sent to all participants and with the webinar feature was viewable in real time during the lecture.

A Filipino home cooked meal - in a slow cooker. Who woulda thunk?

I went home to Connecticut for a well needed weekend from NYC. I took Noah to his bi-monthly cranial appointment and my Mom returned home from her ski adventures in Montana, although with an additional cast from her hand halfway up her arm. (She tore ligaments from her thumb and a shard of bone was lodged in a muscle)

We are extremely close to completing Noah's treatment to correct the flatness of his head. There has been significant improvement with the overall shape and after all of my huffing and puffing it was worth the last 7 months bringing him to CT every two weeks. I am baffled when I look at his first helmet and realize how small he was when we started the process last August.

This evening my mom surprised me by making Pork Adobo, a traditional Filipino dish in her slow cooker. She found a recipe on line, added all the ingredients and let it simmer for 7 hours. I was touched by her gesture since it was the first time anyone in my family attempted to cook Filipino dishes other than myself. It was flavorful, even Noah enjoyed the pork pieces and adobo juice on the rice.

My Beantown Days: Reminiscing without regrets.












Above: entrance of my old apartment where lived for almost 5 years.

To think I lived in Boston/Allston 10 years ago is mind boggling. I referred to that period of my life as the terrible 20's for a few reasons.

I found Boston to be stifling after a while and part of it was because it is a college city. I lived between Boston College and Boston University. Once you complete your four years everyone moves on and if you choose to stay you start to feel old as younger students replace the departed graduates. Quite honestly I outgrew the small city and was yearning to go to the city that never sleeps!

In retrospect being in a smaller town like Boston was the stepping stone for me when I made the decision to move to gritty/glamorous New York City a few years later. It was also the backdrop of the next 5 years as I started to embrace my identity as an adopted Filipina in America. And not to mention some of the characters I met along the way.

After doing some internet research, I quickly became immersed in Fil-Am student organizing, which sometimes felt like an unpaid job. My first year I was a member of the programming committee for the Filipino Intercollegiate Networking Dialogue (FIND) conference hosted at Harvard University. To this day the 1999 FIND spring conference continues to hold the record for the largest attendance of 1,500 delegates that traveled nationwide to take part in the most unprecedented conference.

Sometimes I felt out of place among the Fil-Ams I became friendly with. Part of it was my insecurity about my adoption, as if I had a disadvantage because I grew up 'more American.' I tried to normalize my feelings by building a collection of books about every aspect of the Philippines and absorbing as much information possible. I also became a frequent flier attending Fil-Am conferences and networking with other Fil-Ams easier made me feel more harmonious with my Filipino counterparts.
















Above: Paradise Club - I used to work here as a coat check girl......why?!
















Above: Quincy, MA - in the eyes of Pedro Magni

The other reason why I visited Boston on one of the coldest days this winter was to meet a fellow adoptee Pedro. He attended my alma mater, University of Massachusetts Boston and one of our mutual professors gave him my information. We met at one of my favorite dim sum restaurants, China Pearl in Chinatown and also drove to Quincy to get a glimpse of his Fil-Am stomping ground.

Driving through Allston into Chinatown was a quick time warp of my Beantown years. It warmed my heart to drive around and see familiar places I used to frequent though other spots have not changed i.e. The Paradise, what a dump! Although I thought of that period of my life negatively I realize it helped define who I am today.

GO REDSOX!

Rockin in the Rockies
Filipino Heritage Camp
Frasier, CO


This is my third summer traveling to the Rockies to volunteer as a counselor at the Filipino Heritage Camp.

FHC was developed for children adopted from the Philippines and their families to spend a weekend to meet other adoptees, learn about their Filipino heritage/culture and also have lots of FUN.

I found FHC on a web search and thought it would be a wonderful opportunity to travel west and especially meet other adoptees. Some of the same kids have attended the camp and were familiar faces this summer. Difference was they are now in high school and no longer the rugrats they were 6 years ago.

Interestingly, when I visited the Philippines for my first time in 1998 I met up with a group of adoptees and their parents on a Motherland Tour. Those same people coincidentally were also part of FHC so it was quite a reunion to see them at the camp. I accompanied them to all the orphanages they were adopted from.

There were families old and new - some came from California, Indiana and Ohio to the 3 day camp. I was taken aback how grown up all the kids are since I saw them in 2004. They definitely kept me on my toes but I loved every moment of trying to keep up with them. One night we played speed ball - water polo with out the water. My legs were pulsing the following day.

Noah is a great baby to travel with. He was a little chatty on the plane but otherwise was wonderful - both ways.

Thankfully, John was helpful and looked after Noah while I spent time with the high school kids. He spent time with the Filipinos who cooked our Filipino meals and spoke to the Titas who could not keep their hands off of Noah.

I know in future years Noah will benefit from the cultural aspect of the camp and I want to make sure he is exposed to all things Filipino.

Biological link

Being adopted, I often think about my relation to my family. I dealt with the uncomfortable stares knowing we look nothing alike, feeling scrutinized and . My frustration stemmed from the fact that people could not see us simply as a diverse family. It has taken me years to accept that we are a blended family.

My good friend asked how I felt being Noah's Mom who is, that I know my only biological link. I had a moment of relief thinking to myself, "I am no longer alone." I will always be curious what I looked like or what my temperament was as a baby although am comforted that I can pass on my legacy that I continue to build.

In 2003 I went to the Philippines on an academic summer exchange program. 30 other Filipino Americans and a Mexican American took part in the 2 month language, culture and history program at the University of the Philippines - Dilman in Quezon City.

I desperately wanted to learn Filipino and also do some self exploration. Our daily schedule consisted of language class, workshops on culture and lectures on history, economy and other subjects of interest.

Another aspect of the exchange program was to complete a research paper and I chose to write about international adoption. This allowed be to do some soul searching about my own adoption and had the surprise of my life.

The Inter Country Adoption Board (ICAB) oversees all Filipino children placed with families internationally. After a couple meetings with the director and socialworkers they arranged to have me to visit the orphanage I lived in for the first 5 years before going to the US.

We met with the director who remembered me once I showed her my Philippines passport. I look back now and realize that I was not necessarily prepared to hear anything about my time at the orphanage. This explains why I allowed them to speak in Filipino. I did record the conversation but will have to find someone to translate it.

One of the questions I did ask was the origin of my name. I believed that my biological chose my name but it turned out that the former director, a missionary from Seattle, WA had a niece named Lorelei and wanted to name the next girl of the orhapange Lorial. I was a little disappointed but realized that some of my unknown past was a fabrication of my own thoughts.

Another question I asked was what they recall about my biological mother. This led into more details about my birth. She told me that I was born during a typhoon, which explains my fascination with thunderstorms - my mom can attest to this. She also said that because of the storm they had to wait three days before they could go outside and pick me up. The roads were not paved back then and my biological mother lived further out from the airforce base. Apparently my biological mother did visit a couple times but afterwards the orphanage never heard from her again.

When I tell people I am adopted one of the questions they ask is if I want to meet my biological mother. As far back as I can remember I have always replied no because of the language barrier but especially because she made her decision and I respect it.

I will always be curious about her and how much I may look like her. If I did meet her I would assure her that my life has been absolutely wonderful. She gave me life and also gave me a chance for a better life.

Below I am pointing out a picture of myself I found along the wall of the orphanage. It was taken the day I left for Manila in September of 1980. They have kept it up all these years, which was pretty amazing. I finally felt a connection to the orphanage and has been memorialized on the board.

This is Mia who was also adopted from the Philippines. Her family lives in my hometown and we met a few years ago through Camp Mabuhay - a culture camp for families and their children from the Philippines.

Her Mom and sister drove all the way from CT to attend the Also Know As Culture Day. www.alsoknownas.org

Culture Day was developed by AKA for internationally adopted children to learn about their birth country and other cultures. Other countries represented have been Vietnam, China, and Korea.

I joined the planning committee when I first moved to NYC and helped develop arts and crafts ideas and cuisine from the Philippines. There were not many adoptees from the Philippines but I was just as happy to share ideas of my culture.